The non-borrowing spouse's guide to a reverse mortgage

Key Points

A non-borrowing spouse (NBS) is legally married to the reverse mortgage borrower but is not listed on the loan and does not receive loan proceeds.
Non-borrowing spouses are classified as eligible or ineligible, and that distinction determines which protections may apply.
HECM reverse mortgages provide defined federal protections for eligible non-borrowing spouses, while proprietary reverse mortgages follow lender-specific rules that may offer limited or no protections.

Most couples assume they’ll apply for a reverse mortgage together, but real life doesn’t always work out that way. Maybe one spouse hasn’t reached the qualifying age, isn’t listed on the title, or doesn’t meet another loan requirement. In those cases, one partner may decide to take out the reverse mortgage loan, while the other becomes what is known as a non-borrowing spouse.

While the title may seem straightforward, a non-borrowing spouse isn’t just “the spouse who isn’t on the loan.” There are actually two categories—eligible and ineligible non-borrowing spouses—and the difference between them determines what protections the spouse may have when the borrowing partner dies or permanently leaves the home.

Because protections and risks vary depending on loan type, age requirements, and U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) rules, it’s important for couples to understand how reverse mortgages work before choosing to have only one spouse on the loan.

In this guide, we’ll walk through what a non-borrowing spouse is, how eligible and ineligible spouses differ, what rights they may have under today’s reverse mortgage rules, and what happens when the loan eventually becomes due. This guide is in-depth, so if you’re looking for an answer to a specific question, use the links on the left to jump to that section.

What is a non-borrowing spouse in a reverse mortgage?

In a reverse mortgage, a non-borrowing spouse (NBS) is a legally married spouse who is not listed as a borrower on the reverse mortgage loan. This situation may occur for several reasons, such as one spouse not meeting the age requirement for a Home Equity Conversion Mortgage (HECM) or failing to meet another loan requirement at the time of closing.

A non-borrowing spouse can exist in both HECM reverse mortgages and proprietary reverse mortgages (such as jumbo or other private reverse mortgages), but the protections vary significantly based on the terms of the loan. HECMs have defined federal rules for non-borrowing spouses, while proprietary reverse mortgages rely on lender-specific policies.

Here are a few key points to know about non-borrowing spouses:

A non-borrowing spouse is married to the borrower at the time the reverse mortgage loan originated.
They are not a co-borrower, meaning they do not sign the loan documents, and the loan terms are based solely on the borrowing spouse’s age and qualifications.
They may, depending on the loan type and circumstances, have some rights to remain in the home after the borrowing spouse passes or permanently leaves the property.
Whether a non-borrowing spouse is eligible or ineligible affects the scope of those rights.

Now, let’s look at the difference between an eligible and ineligible non-borrowing spouse—and why that distinction matters for long-term housing security.

→To learn more about how reverse mortgages work, read What is a reverse mortgage and how does it work?

The borrower must meet all loan obligations, including living in the property as the principal residence and paying property charges, including property taxes, fees, hazard insurance. The borrower must maintain the home. If the homeowner does not meet these loan obligations, then the loan will need to be repaid.

Eligible vs. ineligible non-borrowing spouse: What’s the difference?

The core difference between an eligible non-borrowing spouse an ineligible non-borrowing spouse is whether the spouse meets the eligibility requirements for the reverse mortgages. The non-borrowing spouse’s status impacts the protections they are afforded, such as:

Whether they may remain in the home after the loan becomes due.
What repayment options the family may need to consider.

Here are key differences:

Eligible non-borrowing spouse definition

An eligible non-borrowing spouse meets specific criteria set by HUD (for HECMs) or lender guidelines (for proprietary reverse mortgages). When these conditions are met, the eligible spouse may remain in the home after the borrowing spouse dies, as long as they continue to meet the ongoing obligations of the loan.

An eligible NBS typically must:

Have been married to the borrower at the time the reverse mortgage closed (or be eligible under same-sex couple rules)
Have the marriage documented in the loan file
Continue to live in the home as their principal residence
Stay current on property taxes, homeowners insurance, and required maintenance
Meet any additional HUD or lender documentation requirements

A member of a same-sex couple can be an eligible non-borrowing spouse if they were in a committed relationship with the borrower but were prohibited from legally marrying based on gender at the time of the HECM loan’s origination. To be eligible, the surviving spouse must have legally married the borrower prior to their death and remained married until the borrower’s death.

Eligible non-borrowing spouses do not receive loan proceeds, and they do not become borrowers after the death of the borrowing spouse—but they may be eligible for a deferral period, allowing them to stay in the home as long as they meet the terms of the loan.

Ineligible non-borrowing spouse definition

An ineligible non-borrowing spouse does not meet the requirements listed above. This may happen if the marriage began after the loan closed, documentation was missing, or the spouse was not living in property at the time of origination.

Ineligible non-borrowing spouses do not receive the same protections to remain in the home. When the loan becomes due—for example, when the borrower dies, leaves the home, or otherwise fails to meet the terms of the loan—they are not automatically entitled to remain in the property.

The estate or heirs would need to repay the reverse mortgage loan balance, refinance, or sell the home for the spouse to continue living there.

If you prefer to see the differences side by side, the table below summarizes how eligible and ineligible non-borrowing spouses compare.

Category	Eligible Non-Borrowing Spouse	Ineligible Non-Borrowing Spouse
Marital status at loan closing	Married to the borrower at the time the reverse mortgage closes and documented in the loan file	May be married or unmarried; does not meet HUD’s documentation or timing requirements for eligible NBS status
Age requirement	No minimum age required	No minimum age required
Occupancy at closing	Lived in the home as a principal residence at loan closing	Did not occupy the home as a principal residence at closing, or occupancy was not documented
Protections after borrower’s death	May remain in the home under a deferral period if all HUD requirements are met	No automatic right to remain; loan becomes due and payable
Obligation to repay the loan	Not personally responsible for repaying the loan balance	Not personally responsible for repaying the loan balance
Applies to	Applies to HECM loans under HUD rules	Applies to both HECM and proprietary loans; protections depend on lender and loan type

Next, let’s look at how a co-borrower differs from a non-borrowing spouse and why some couples choose one structure over the other.

To learn more, please visit the CFPB’s Reverse Mortgage: A Discussion Guide.

Co-borrower vs non-borrowing spouse: Why the difference matters

Understanding the difference between a co-borrower and a non-borrowing spouse is essential when deciding how to structure a reverse mortgage. A co-borrower is fully a part of the reverse mortgage loan. They must, at minimum:

Meet the age requirement (62+ for HECM; varies for proprietary loans)
Be on the home’s title
Share equal ownership and responsibility

Co-borrowers are protected under all loan rules, including the right to remain in the home after the other borrower dies. Note: loan proceeds and limits are based on the younger spouse/co-borrower’s age.

On the other hand, a non-borrowing spouse is married to the borrower but not on the loan. The non-borrowing spouse (whether eligible or ineligible):

May be under the qualifying age or not on title
Does not receive loan proceeds
Has limited protections, depending on whether they are eligible or ineligible

There is a financial trade-off to consider–having only one spouse on the loan may result in a higher available loan amount, but it introduces more risk for the spouse not listed as a borrower.

This decision should be weighed carefully, especially for couples planning long-term occupancy.

HECM and most proprietary reverse mortgages require applicants to complete a counseling session with a HUD-approved reverse mortgage counselor. This meeting can help you better understand your options and which format will work best for your situation.

→ To learn more about eligibility requirements, read Reverse Mortgage Eligibility Requirements

What protections are available to eligible non-borrowing spouses?

For HECM reverse mortgages, HUD established specific protections for eligible non-borrowing spouses (NBS) designed to help them remain in the home after the borrowing spouse dies. These protections were introduced in Mortgagee Letter 2014-07 and later strengthened in 2015 to provide clearer, more consistent standards.

This is the part where things get a little technical. The good news is that these protections are designed to be practical, not punitive, and most of them come down to continuing to live in the home and keeping up with basic property responsibilities.

Keep in mind, these protections apply only to eligible non-borrowing spouses with HECM loans. Proprietary (non-FHA) reverse mortgages may have different policies, which we’ll discuss in a later section.

Proprietary reverse mortgages are not insured by the FHA and are not subject to HUD’s non‑borrowing spouse protections. Any protections, if offered, are determined solely by the lender and outlined in the loan documents.

Loan is not foreclosed or due as long as obligations are met

If the eligible non-borrowing spouse meets HUD’s requirements, they may remain in the home under what is called the deferral period. During this period, the eligible NBS must continue to meet the key obligations of the original loan. The lender may not foreclose or require the loan to be repaid solely because the borrowing spouse has died.

In order for the deferral period to apply to a non-borrowing spouse, they must have been and continue to:

Be married to the HECM mortgagor at the time of loan closing and remain married throughout the borrower’s lifetime.
Be properly disclosed to the mortgagee at origination and specifically named as an NBS in the HECM documents.
Occupy, and continue to occupy, the property as a principal resident.

Failure to meet the NBS referral requirements will result in the loan becoming due. You’ll notice these requirements come up often, and they might even seem a bit repetitive. That’s because nearly all non-borrowing spouse protections rely on meeting these obligations.

Right to remain in the home after the borrowing spouse dies

If the eligible NBS meets the above requirements, they may continue to live in the home and are not required to repay the loan at that time. When the NBS dies, moves, or otherwise fails to meet the terms of the deferral period, the loan becomes due.

No requirement to obtain title within 90 days

Older versions of HUD guidance required an eligible NBS to establish a marketable title quickly after the borrower’s death. Updated rules removed that requirement. Now, the spouse only has to have a legal right to remain in the home, which may include:

Being on title, or
Having documented legal interest, or
Having the ability to obtain title in the future through probate or other legal processes

Annual certification requirement

The eligible spouse must certify annually that they continue to meet HUD’s conditions—primarily that they continue to occupy the home and remain in compliance with property obligations. Generally, this form is mailed to you each year by your lender.

Protection against owing more than the home is worth

Because HECMs are non-recourse loans, neither the original borrower nor the eligible spouse will ever owe more than the home’s market value when it is sold to settle the loan.

Non‑Recourse Disclaimer

A reverse mortgage is a non‑recourse loan. This means the borrower or heirs will never owe more than the value of the home when the loan is repaid through the sale of the property.

What are the requirements to maintain deferral status?

This section covers the ongoing responsibilities that keep the loan in deferral status. None of them are unusual—they’re simply the same obligations most homeowners already manage. To keep deferral status, the eligible non-borrowing spouse must meet all of the following requirements:

Continue occupying the home as a principal residence: The home must remain the spouse’s primary residence. Extended absences, generally more than 12 consecutive months, may cause the loan to become due.
Stay current on property taxes: All required property taxes must be paid on time. Falling behind may result in default and loss of deferral protections.
Maintain homeowners insurance: Continuous hazard insurance coverage is required. Any lapse in coverage may place the loan in default.
Keep the home in good repair: The property must be maintained according to HUD’s standards. Significant neglect or unresolved safety issues may jeopardize deferral status.
Certify eligibility annually: HUD requires eligible non-borrowing spouses to complete an annual certification confirming they continue to meet occupancy and property obligations. Generally, this form is sent to you in the mail each year.

If any of these conditions are no longer met, the loan may become due and payable, and foreclosure proceedings could begin if the issue is not resolved.

What happens to the non-borrowing spouse in a reverse mortgage when the borrower dies?

Reverse mortgages generally become due and payable when the borrowing spouse dies or permanently leaves the home, such as moving into a long-term care facility for more than 12 consecutive months, or purchasing a new primary residence.

When an eligible non-borrowing spouse is involved, however, the process works differently. Instead of immediate repayment, the loan enters what HUD refers to as a deferral period. During this time, the lender does not require repayment of the loan balance, and no foreclosure action is initiated solely because the spouse dies or leaves the home.

During the deferral period:

Loan proceeds are frozen. No additional funds may be drawn from the reverse mortgage.
The eligible non-borrowing spouse may remain in the home if all HUD conditions continue to be met.

To maintain deferral status for a HECM after the borrowing spouse dies or permanently leaves the home, the eligible non-borrowing spouse must meet all of the following requirements:

The non-borrowing spouse was legally married to the borrower at the time of loan closing and remained married until the borrowing spouse’s death or departure from the home.
The HECM is not in default for any reason unrelated to the borrower’s death (such as unpaid property taxes or lapsed insurance).
The individual is identified as a non-borrowing spouse in the HECM loan documents.
The non-borrowing spouse intends to continue using the home as their principal residence.
The non-borrowing spouse continues to pay property taxes, homeowners insurance, and maintenance costs, and keeps the home in good repair.

As long as these conditions remain in place, the eligible non-borrowing spouse may continue living in the home without being required to repay the reverse mortgage immediately. At a high level, this means the loan doesn’t immediately come due just because the borrowing spouse passes away, provided the non-borrowing spouse meets the requirements above.

Keep in mind, this deferral framework applies specifically to FHA-insured Home Equity Conversion Mortgages (HECMs). Proprietary reverse mortgages may follow different rules, which will be outlined in the loan documents.

What happens when a non-borrowing spouse moves to a long-term facility?

When an eligible non-borrowing spouse (NBS) moves into a long-term care facility, the impact on the reverse mortgage depends on whether the move is considered temporary or permanent under HUD guidelines.

Temporary absence

Moves related to health or care needs are understandably stressful. HUD rules try to distinguish between temporary care and a permanent move, and timing plays a key role here. If the non-borrowing spouse leaves the home for medical treatment, rehabilitation, or short-term care, but intends to return, the loan generally remains in deferral status.

During this period:

The reverse mortgage loan is not called due.
No foreclosure action is initiated.
All loan obligations, such as paying property taxes, homeowners insurance, and maintenance, must continue to be met.

Temporary absences generally do not affect eligibility as long as the home remains the non-borrowing spouse’s principal residence and the absence does not exceed the allowable timeframe.

Permanent move (12 consecutive months or more)

A move is typically considered permanent if the non-borrowing spouse is absent from the home for 12 consecutive months or longer. Once that threshold is reached, the deferral period may end, and the reverse mortgage loan may become due and payable.

Key timing points to understand:

The first 12 months of absence are generally treated as temporary.
During those 12 months, the loan status usually remains unchanged.
After 12 consecutive months, the lender may require documentation confirming that the non-borrowing spouse has permanently left the home.

If the move is determined to be permanent, the lender may begin the process of requesting repayment, unless another eligible occupant remains in the home.

Because long-term care situations often involve complex timing and documentation, non-borrowing spouses may benefit from working with a HUD-approved counselor to understand how their specific circumstances could affect deferral status.

What happens if the non-borrowing spouse gets a new spouse?

If an eligible non-borrowing spouse remarries after the borrowing spouse dies, the new marriage doesn’t change the status of the reverse mortgage, nor does it extend protections to the new spouse. Deferral protections are tied specifically to the original marriage between the borrower and their eligible non-borrowing spouse at the time the reverse mortgage closed.

Here’s what that means in practice:

The eligible non-borrowing spouse may continue to live in the home under deferral status, as long as they continue to meet all HUD requirements.
A new spouse may move into the home, but does not gain any rights to the reverse mortgage.
The loan remains tied to the original borrower and the eligible non-borrowing spouse only.

If the eligible non-borrowing spouse later dies or permanently leaves the home, the reverse mortgage loan will become due and payable, and the new spouse will not have deferral rights under HECM rules.

Situations that lead to a loss of eligibility for NBS

Protections for an eligible non-borrowing spouse depend on continued compliance with HUD requirements. If those conditions are no longer met, deferral status may end, and the reverse mortgage loan may become due and payable. Below are the most common situations that may result in a loss of eligibility.

This section may sound a little strict, but these situations are largely about maintaining the home and keeping paperwork in order, not catching anyone off guard or taking your home away.

Failure to maintain property obligations

Eligible non-borrowing spouses must continue meeting the same property-related obligations required under the original loan terms. Loss of eligibility may occur if the spouse:

Defaults on property taxes
Allows homeowners insurance to lapse
Lets the property fall into significant disrepair (as defined by your lender)

If these obligations are not met, the lender may declare the loan in default and request repayment.

Moving out or changing the primary residence

Deferral protections apply only while the home remains the spouse’s principal residence. Eligibility may be lost if:

The spouse moves out permanently
The home is vacant for more than 12 consecutive months
The property is used primarily as a vacation home or secondary residence

Lenders may also require annual occupancy certification to confirm continued eligibility.

Failure to maintain a legal right to remain in the home

Although updated HUD guidance no longer requires an eligible non-borrowing spouse to obtain title within a specific timeframe, the spouse must still have a legal right to occupy the property. Eligibility may be lost if unresolved issues arise, such as:

Title disputes
Probate delays that prevent lawful occupancy
Challenges to the spouse’s legal interest in the home

Discovery of non-disclosure at loan origination

If it is later discovered that a spouse was married to the borrower at the time of closing but was not disclosed in the loan documents, HUD protections may not apply. In such cases:

Deferral rights may be denied
The lender may treat the situation as a loan violation
Retroactive eligibility is generally not available

Sale or transfer of the property

Selling the home or transferring ownership typically triggers the due-on-sale clause in a reverse mortgage. Loss of eligibility may occur if:

The home is sold
The title is transferred to another party, including a family member
The property is placed into a trust without lender approval

Any of these actions may cause the loan to become immediately due.

Non-borrowing spouse rights with proprietary (non-HECM) reverse mortgages

Unlike HECM loans, there’s no single rulebook here, which is why reviewing the loan documents matters so much with proprietary reverse mortgages. While HECM reverse mortgages include specific, federally defined protections for eligible non-borrowing spouses, proprietary reverse mortgages often work differently.

Proprietary reverse mortgages are not insured by the Federal Housing Administration (FHA) and are not governed by HUD’s non-borrowing spouse protections. Instead, each lender establishes its own policies regarding non-borrowing spouses.

In plain terms, this is what it means for non-borrowing spouses:

Protections may not apply—or may differ: Some proprietary lenders offer protections similar to HECM deferral rules, while others provide limited or no protections at all. Policies vary by lender and loan, so make sure you understand the terms of your reverse mortgage.
HECM rules should not be assumed: Federal protections for eligible non-borrowing spouses under HECM loans do not automatically extend to proprietary reverse mortgages.
Loan documents matter: The only reliable way to understand non-borrowing spouse rights under a proprietary reverse mortgage is to review the loan agreement carefully. Key terms are defined by the lender, not by federal regulation.
Jumbo reverse mortgages deserve extra scrutiny: Many proprietary reverse mortgages are designed for higher-value homes. Because loan amounts are larger, the financial consequences of limited or absent non-borrowing spouse protections may be more significant.

For couples considering a proprietary reverse mortgage, it’s especially important to review non-borrowing spouse provisions before closing and to discuss potential risks with a knowledgeable lender or housing professional.

Important Note:

Proprietary reverse mortgages are not insured by the FHA and are not subject to HUD’s non-borrowing spouse protections. Any protections, if available, are defined solely by the lender and outlined in the loan documents. HECM rules do not apply to these loan types.

Conclusion

Reverse mortgages, especially situations involving a non-borrowing spouse, come with a lot of fine print. That’s not always fun to read, but it matters. Understanding the difference between being a co-borrower, an eligible non-borrowing spouse, or an ineligible one may shape what life looks like years down the road.

The encouraging part is this: today’s rules for HECM reverse mortgages were built with real people in mind. Protections help surviving spouses stay in their homes, provided certain conditions are met. But knowing where those protections stop is important, especially when proprietary reverse mortgages enter the picture.

If you’re exploring a reverse mortgage as a couple, asking these questions early may save stress later. Talk openly, read loan documents carefully, and take advantage of HUD-approved counseling and professional guidance. Those conversations may feel technical and overwhelming, but they often lead to more confidence and fewer surprises.

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This article is intended for general informational and educational purposes only and should not be construed as financial or tax advice. For tax advice, please consult a tax professional. For more information about whether a reverse mortgage fits into your retirement strategy, you should consult your financial advisor.