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Solo aging: How to plan for care, costs, and your future
In this article:
- What is solo aging and are you a solo ager?
- What are the biggest challenges of solo aging?
- How can you improve emotional well-being as a solo ager?
- Who will you call if you have an emergency?
- Who will make decisions for you if you can't make them yourself?
- What medical and legal documents do you need as a solo ager?
- How can solo agers protect themselves from financial exploitation?
- What should financial planning for solo agers include?
- What organizations offer support for those aging alone?
- How do you pay for care when you don't have a family caregiver?
- Solo aging checklist: what to put in place, in what order
- Aging solo: Plan for the future you want
- FAQs about successful solo aging
More Americans are solo-agers, defined as someone who does not have family or friends nearby to provide support in a crisis as they age.
Solo-aging comes with additional challenges, including maintaining a sense of community, getting help when needed, and arranging for someone to assist with future medical and financial decisions.
Successful solo-agers need to ensure their legal documents are in order, start building a community, and plan for potential future care costs.
New data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention shows that Americans are living longer than ever. The average person born in 2024 can expect to live to age 79, more than half a year longer than in 2023.
As we live longer, planning for our later years becomes even more important—especially for people who may not have a spouse, adult children, or other family and friends they can rely on for support.
Dr. Sara Zeff Geber, an author and expert on aging, retirement planning, and senior living, coined the phrase “solo aging” to explain the experience of growing older without a reliable family support system to turn to for help.
If you’re facing aging without support, planning ahead can help you build the resources and relationships you need to make decisions on your own terms. This guide explains what solo aging really is (and what it isn’t), the challenges to prepare for, and practical steps you can take now to plan for your financial and future care needs.
What is solo aging and are you a solo ager?
Geber says, “A solo ager is someone who does not have family nearby who are able and willing to intervene in a crisis and who will be available to provide support as the solo ager requires it.”
In other words, solo aging isn’t necessarily just living alone or being single. What matters is whether you have people you can realistically rely on as you get older—particularly if you have an emergency, need help around the house, or can no longer make decisions on your own.
For example, you might be a solo ager if you:
- Never married or had children and don’t have other family members who can take on a caregiving or decision-making role.
- Have grown children, but they live far away or aren’t able or willing to provide ongoing support.
- Are divorced or widowed and don’t have another reliable support person nearby.
- Have a spouse or partner who is unable to provide the support you may eventually need.
- Have close friends and an active social life, but aren’t sure who you could call in an emergency or trust to make important decisions on your behalf.
Living by yourself doesn’t automatically make you a solo ager. You may live alone but have children, relatives, or other trusted people who are willing and able to step in when you need them. Additionally, solo aging may not be all or nothing. For example, you may have an adult child who can fly in for a major surgery but isn’t available to pick up a prescription.
What are the biggest challenges of solo aging?
Many traditional approaches to aging in place or retirement planning assume there will be a spouse, adult child, or other family member available to provide assistance. But solo agers might not have that support.
Common challenges solo agers face can include:
- Staying socially connected: Maintaining friendships and a sense of community can take more intention as you age, particularly if you don’t have family nearby or built-in opportunities for regular connection.
- Getting help when you need it: Who would you call if you fell, became sick, needed a ride home from a medical procedure or if you were unexpectedly hospitalized?
- Making medical and financial decisions: If you’re temporarily or permanently unable to make decisions for yourself, who will communicate your healthcare wishes or manage important financial matters?
- Protecting your finances: Without another person regularly involved in your finances, it may be harder for someone else to notice suspicious transactions, scams, or signs of financial exploitation.
- Planning for transportation: Driving may become difficult or impossible at some point, and transportation needs can arise long before someone stops driving altogether.
- Preparing financially: Solo agers may need to pay for services that a spouse or family member might otherwise provide, from household help and transportation to caregiving.
- Planning for long-term care: If you eventually need help with daily activities, you may not have a family caregiver available to provide it. Thinking ahead about what kind of care you’d prefer, who could provide it, and how you’d pay for it can give you more choices later.
Not every solo ager will face every challenge on this list. You might have a large retirement nest egg and an active group of friends, for example, but still have trouble finding someone who can pick up a prescription at the drop of a hat. The goal is to identify where you already have support and where you may need to build it.
How can you improve emotional well-being as a solo ager?
Developing and maintaining strong social connections is important for your mental health. In fact, research shows that social connections can improve cognitive health in older adults. But for solo agers, creating a community isn’t just about having someone to grab a bite with. It’s also about developing relationships with people who can support you over time.
Begin with the connections you already have, then look for opportunities to expand your circle. Here are a few places to start:
- Local clubs, faith communities, senior or community centers where you can meet people with similar beliefs or values.
- Fitness groups and hobby organizations where you can stay active and meet people with similar interests.
- Volunteering can be particularly valuable because it creates a sense of purpose while helping you build relationships with others.
- Neighbors might also serve as part of your community, as you can check up on each other.
Most importantly, think of community as reciprocal. Look for ways to show up for other people now—whether that’s checking in on a neighbor, offering a ride, or volunteering your time. Building the community you want around you starts with being part of that community yourself.
Who will you call if you have an emergency?
A strong social network doesn’t necessarily mean you have someone who can help you at a moment’s notice. Adult children may have their own busy lives, and a friend who’s happy to join you for dinner after work might not be available to drive you home from a medical appointment at 3 PM.
Solo agers should think about who they can call for different types of help, rather than assuming one person will fill the entire role.
Consider who could:
- Respond or check on you in an emergency
- Drive you to or from a medical appointment or procedure
- Help with groceries, meals, or household tasks if you’re temporarily unable to do them
- Visit or help coordinate support if you’re hospitalized
- Serve as a contact for a doctor, hospital, or first responder if necessary
Friends, neighbors, relatives, and other trusted individuals can all be part of your network. In some cases, you might even hire people to fill some of these roles. Once you’ve identified those people, create an emergency contact list and make sure the appropriate people have a way to contact each other. You may also want to identify backups in case someone is unavailable.
Who will make decisions for you if you can’t make them yourself?
One of the most important decisions a solo ager can make is who they trust to act on their behalf if they become unable to make medical or financial decisions themselves. That person doesn’t have to be a spouse or adult child. Depending on the role and the laws in your state, you may be able to choose a trusted friend, another relative, or a qualified professional.
Think about who you trust to make decisions based on what you want, rather than what they would choose for themselves. If you don’t want life-sustaining treatments, for example, will the person follow your wishes?
For financial matters, consider whether they’re responsible with money and comfortable managing important tasks. For healthcare decisions, choose someone who understands your wishes and is willing to advocate for them.
Before naming someone, ask whether they’re willing to take on the responsibility and explain what the role might entail. Consider choosing a backup option, as well. If your first choice is a friend close to your age, consider a younger candidate who is more likely to offer assistance years down the line.
What medical and legal documents do you need as a solo ager?
Once you’ve decided who you trust, you’ll need to make sure they have the legal authority and information necessary to act on your behalf. Because requirements and terminology can vary by state, consider talking with an estate planning or elder law attorney.
Your plan may include:
- Healthcare proxy: Names someone to make healthcare decisions for you if you can’t make them yourself.
- Durable financial power of attorney: Authorizes someone to handle certain financial or legal matters on your behalf, depending on the authority you grant.
- Advance directive: Documents your wishes for medical care if you’re unable to communicate them yourself.
- Will and other estate planning documents: Explain how you want your property and other assets handled after your death.
Make sure your trusted contacts know where to find important documents and keep key medical, financial, and legal information organized and accessible to the appropriate people. You should also revisit your plan periodically to ensure it reflects your current wishes.
How can solo agers protect themselves from financial exploitation?
Solo agers can be more vulnerable to financial fraud or exploitation because they may not have a spouse or family member who can spot unusual activity or provide a second opinion on financial decisions.
Building safeguards into your finances can provide another layer of protection. Consider:
- Setting up account alerts: Bank and credit card alerts can notify you about large purchases, withdrawals, or other unusual activity.
- Naming a trusted contact: Some financial institutions allow you to designate someone they can contact if they suspect financial exploitation or have concerns about your well-being. They generally serve as a safeguard and don’t have the authority to make transactions.
- Reviewing your accounts and credit reports regularly: Look for transactions or accounts you don’t recognize and investigate suspicious activity promptly.
For some solo agers, particularly those without someone they trust to oversee important financial matters, a professional fiduciary may be another option. A fiduciary can be hired to manage certain financial or personal affairs and is generally required to act in the client’s best interests, although specific duties and requirements vary.
These safeguards aren’t about giving up control of your finances. Putting the right checks in place can help you protect your money and maintain your financial independence as you age.
The Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (CFPB) also provides resources to help older adults protect themselves from financial fraud.
→ Learn more: Protecting your home from mortgage scams
What should financial planning for solo agers include?
Financial planning can be especially important for solo agers because you’re relying on just one retirement savings pool. Start by getting a clear picture of what you have and what you spend. Review your retirement income, savings, investments, and other assets, then compare those resources with your current and expected expenses.
Consider working with a qualified financial professional to help you determine whether you’re on track and identify potential gaps. From there, think specifically about expenses that could become more important as you age:
- Build an emergency cushion: Keep enough accessible savings to handle unexpected expenses or to navigate downturns in the market if you rely on investments.
- Budget for paid help: Consider services you handle yourself today but might eventually need to hire someone to provide, such as home maintenance, transportation, meal delivery, housekeeping, or help managing financial and legal matters.
- Plan for healthcare expenses: Account for insurance premiums and out-of-pocket medical costs, and understand how those expenses could change as you age. Note that Medicare premiums can vary based on income.
- Prepare for long-term care: If you don’t expect to have an unpaid family caregiver, think about how you would pay for help at home or care in another setting. We’ll cover options for funding care in more detail below.
- Consider your home as part of the bigger picture: If you’re a homeowner, home equity may be one of your largest assets. Think about whether you want to remain in your home, downsize, or potentially access some of that equity later to help meet retirement needs.
The reality is you can’t predict exactly what aging will look like for you. The goal is to give yourself enough financial flexibility to pay for the support you need while preserving as much choice and independence as possible.
What organizations offer support for those aging alone?
Building a support system doesn’t have to mean finding friends or family members to handle every need. Depending on where you live, your income, and the resources available in your community, local organizations may provide free or reduced-cost assistance with meals, transportation, household needs, healthcare, and other everyday tasks.
A good place to start is Eldercare Locator, a service of the U.S. Administration for Community Living that connects older adults with aging services in their communities. It can also help you find your local Area Agency on Aging (AAA).
Other resources to explore include:
- Meals on Wheels: Local programs provide home-delivered meals and regular check-ins for older adults who have difficulty shopping for or preparing meals.
- Senior and community centers: Local centers may offer meals, transportation, fitness programs, social activities, and connections to other services.
- Local transportation programs: Some communities provide reduced-cost or specialized transportation for older adults who no longer drive or need help getting to medical appointments and other destinations.
- PACE programs: The Program of All-Inclusive Care for the Elderly (PACE) coordinates medical care and supportive services for certain older adults who meet eligibility requirements and want to continue living in the community.
You may not need any of these services today. Learning what’s available in your community now, however, can help you build a larger network of support and know where to turn if your needs change later.
How do you pay for care when you don’t have a family caregiver?
For solo agers, caregiving plans often include paying for help that a spouse, adult child, or other family member might informally provide. That could include anything from a few hours of help with meals and errands each week to daily personal care or eventually moving in with a loved one.
There’s no way to know what type of care you’ll need decades from now. But understanding what care costs in your area—and which resources could help pay for it—can give you more options if your needs change.
What do Medicare and Medicaid cover?
Medicare generally does not pay for ongoing custodial long-term care, such as help with bathing, dressing, eating, and other activities of daily living. It may cover certain home health or skilled nursing services when you meet Medicare’s eligibility requirements, but don’t count on it to pay for daily care in the long term.
Medicaid is different. It is a needs-based program that may help eligible individuals pay for long-term healthcare services, including nursing facility care and, depending on the state and program, certain home- and community-based services. Eligibility requirements and available benefits vary by state, so see what is available in your area.
Understanding these limits ahead of time can help you identify expenses you may need to cover through savings, insurance, home equity, or other resources.
Should solo agers consider long-term care insurance?
Long-term care insurance is one option for helping cover healthcare services, such as in-home care, assisted living, or nursing home care, depending on the policy. It may be particularly worth exploring if you expect to rely primarily on paid caregivers rather than family support.
Policies differ significantly in their premiums, benefits, waiting periods, exclusions, and the types of care they cover, so it’s important to understand exactly what you’re purchasing. Age and health can also affect both eligibility and premiums, so if long-term care insurance is part of your plan, it may be worth exploring your options before you need assistance.
Can you use home equity to help pay for care?
If you own your home, your home equity may be one of your largest retirement assets—and one potential resource for paying for care or other expenses as you age.
There are several ways homeowners may be able to access that equity:
- HELOC: A home equity line of credit (HELOC) lets you borrow against your home’s equity as needed, up to an approved limit. It may provide flexibility if care expenses arise gradually, but payments are generally required and interest rates are typically variable.
- Home equity loan: A home equity loan provides a lump sum that’s repaid through monthly payments, typically at a fixed interest rate. It may make sense when you know approximately how much you need, but it adds another monthly expense to your budget. (Finance of America does not offer home equity loans.)
- Reverse mortgage: A reverse mortgage may allow older homeowners to convert a portion of home equity into funds without requiring monthly mortgage payments. The loan generally becomes due when the last borrower sells the home, moves out, or passes away. Borrowers must continue to meet the loan terms, including paying property taxes and homeowners insurance and maintaining the home.
- Selling or downsizing: Moving to a less expensive or easier-to-maintain home may free up equity that can be used for future expenses while also reducing the amount of home maintenance you need to manage.
The goal isn’t necessarily to choose one funding source today. It’s to understand the resources available to you so you can build a plan that gives you flexibility later. For many solo agers, that may mean combining several resources—such as retirement income, savings, insurance, and home equity—to pay for support that allows you to live life the way you choose.
Solo aging checklist: what to put in place, in what order
Planning for solo aging can feel like a lot to tackle all at once. The good news is you don’t need to make every decision today. Start by putting the essentials in place and build your plan over time. Think not just about what you need now, but what you might need in 5 or 10 years. Remember to build some flexibility into your plan—we never know what the future will look like.
This checklist provides a good starting point:
| Task | Why it matters for solo agers | When to do it | |
| 1 | Name a durable power of attorney and a healthcare proxy | Gives people you trust the authority to act for you if needed | As part of your estate planning |
| 2 | Name backup agents for both roles | Your first choice may not always be available or able to serve | At the same time as #1 |
| 3 | Complete advance directives | Helps ensure your healthcare wishes are understood and documented | At the same time as #1, review periodically |
| 4 | Build an emergency and practical support network | Different people may be able to help with rides, emergencies, errands, or other needs | Begin the process now and update as relationships change |
| 5 | Add a trusted contact to financial accounts | Adds another safeguard against potential fraud or financial exploitation | When reviewing your finances |
| 6 | Learn what aging resources are available locally | Community programs may provide meals, transportation, care coordination, and other support | Before you need them |
| 7 | Estimate local care costs | Helps you understand how much you may need to budget for paid support | As part of retirement planning |
| 8 | Make a plan for funding future care | Savings, insurance, income, and home equity may all play a role | Along with #7; revisit periodically |
| 9 | Consider whether your home will support your future needs | Your housing can affect your safety, independence, expenses, and access to support | Before needs change; reassess over time |
| 10 | Review your entire plan | Your finances, health, relationships, and preferences can change | Annually, and after major life changes |
Aging solo: Plan for the future you want
Solo aging is a growing trend, making it increasingly important to think intentionally about what you want your later years to look like. Building a plan today can give you more say in where you live, who you rely on, how you pay for care, and what happens if you need help making important decisions.
You don’t need to have every detail figured out at once. Start with the decisions you can make now, build a network of people and resources you trust, and revisit your plan as your life and priorities change.
If you think a reverse mortgage might be a part of your retirement planning, the Finance of America team is here to help. Learn more about our reverse mortgage products or use our reverse mortgage calculator to see how much you may be able to access.
FAQs about successful solo aging
Is solo aging the same as living alone?
No. Someone who lives alone may still have immediate family nearby to provide some support. Solo aging generally refers to navigating later life without a spouse, partner, or adult children available to provide support.
Who should be on a solo ager’s professional support team?
A solo ager’s professional support team may include a financial professional, elder law attorney, tax professional, healthcare providers, and an aging life care or geriatric care manager. The right team depends on your needs, but these professionals can help with financial planning, establish a health care proxy, provide hands-on care, and help you find the support you need.
What happens if a solo ager can no longer live alone?
If independent living is no longer possible, solo agers have several options, including receiving in-home care, or moving to an assisted living, senior living, or continuing care retirement community (CCRC). To have more control over where and how you want to live, research your options and compare potential costs before you need additional support.
Who makes medical decisions for me if I have no family?
Generally, you can name a trusted friend as your healthcare proxy to make medical decisions if you become unable to make them yourself, but requirements vary by state. Without an appropriate healthcare decision-maker in place, state law may require a physician, an ethics committee, or an appointed guardian to make decisions for you.
Can I name a professional as my power of attorney?
Yes, in most states, you can name a professional, such as a fiduciary, lawyer, or accountant, as your power of attorney. The rules, responsibilities, and potential costs can vary, so consider talking with an estate planning attorney about your options and whom you can legally appoint.
To learn more, please visit the CFPB’s Reverse Mortgage: A Discussion Guide.
About the author
is the Web Content Manager at Finance of America and a journalist with more than 10 years of experience whose work has appeared in MoneyWise, MSN, Yahoo! Finance, and The Motley Fool. She specializes in making complex financial topics accessible and is passionate about advancing financial literacy.
Disclaimer
This article is intended for general informational and educational purposes only and should not be construed as financial or tax advice. For tax advice, please consult a tax professional. For more information about whether a reverse mortgage fits into your retirement strategy, you should consult your financial advisor.
